Ladies, the good intentions are here-- I think it’s just a matter of taking a different approach. Here are some ways you can support your man:
How to Support Your Man
1. Trust him. Yes
we live in a culture that preaches that “All men are dogs,” and “Guys
will sleep with anyone.” Those assumptions are so totally untrue. Men
have a loyalty gene that begins to kick in the moment that someone who
matters exhibits real trust and faith in them. So when he says, "I love
you," KNOW that he means it.
2. Show Optimism.
When he comes home with a harebrained scheme about building a rocket to
the moon, respond to him, “Fantastic! I can’t wait to get there!” Sure
it may seem a little nutty for anyone who isn’t an astrophysicist, but
he sure will LOVE the fact that you’re on board regardless of the
improbability of him completing that rocket. And your support is always
an extra incentive – because your guy wants to reward your unconditional
3. Push him. Once he decides to build
that rocket, don’t let him get away with NOT doing it! There’s a fine
line though: do not turn his lack of completion into an insult. Guys
tend to thrive on a gentle mixture of belief and prodding. Unless you’re
with a guy who never seems to complete anything, you can’t hammer him
with, “What happened to that rocket you were supposed to build? I knew
you wouldn’t do it!” No, you want to go with something more along the
lines of, “How is your rocket project going? How can I help you keep at
it?” The message you’re sending is that you believe in him and that you
want him to succeed. He’ll love you even more for that.
4. Remember that he’s your partner.
There’s something to the saying, “Let a man be a man.” Guys want to
provide and protect. This desire is probably driven in some aspects by
biology but to an even greater extent, societal and sociological
influences. And those influences are intense. The pressure to be that
protector/provider is great, sometimes suffocating. Assure him that your
love and support for him is unconditional. Let him know that you two
are a team; working together towards the same goals... and that the
success of your relationship is up to both of you.
The fact is
that some guys won't open up about all the stressors in their lives.
It’s the man mentality. Encourage him to be open and help him realize
that manhood shouldn’t be predicated upon "appearing" strong.
addition to these tips—ask your guy today, “How can I show you how much I
support you?” The fact that you even thought to ask that simple
question shows him you are there for him... and that's what being a
supportive partner is all about.